Looking Back, and Moving On: 2013

                                      2013.......Where Do I Begin......                                                     

    At points in my life, I had feelings that I was "blessed" by an opportunity, or that I was "blessed" with a situation. I can now say, without doubt, that I truly am blessed. There is no question the power of that phrase any longer, and it sure didn't take long to realize it. On February 7th, time stopped. At that moment, on that morning, everything went silent. All was blocked, until I heard the faint cry of life from my newborn son.

    Ten months in, and I still can't convince myself that this isn't a dream. It's all so perfect. Events, moments, dreams, that I could only fantasize about for most of my life, had all come true. I was married, celebrating our 1st wedding anniversary. We welcomed Harlan into our lives and the world. I was blessed with a new job and new beginnings. It all seems like a mirage, an illusion of the greatest variety.

    Each year is faced with it's downs as well. Family members left us, world events shaped us. Financial difficulties galvanized us. Throughout all of this, though, we have become stronger as a family, and I as a person. These experiences, as tough as they can be, exist constantly. A test to make sure we are always on our heels. Pain is the currency we all must pay, for the reward at the end of the day.

    I'm not one for resolutions, simply for the fact that a single promise to strive for is never enough, and it leaves the door open for failure, which often occurs. All I can aim for, is to be a better man, a better husband, and a better father, than I was this previous year. Struggle is inevitable, but with determination and focus, success is guaranteed. Here's to 110%, all day, every day.

    So, as we come close to midnight, on this day, 31st December, 2013, I want to thank everyone who has helped, in any way to achieve our family's hopes and dreams this past year. From my parents, to Amy's. From my co-workers, new and old. From friends to acquaintances. I thank you all, and wish you a very happy new year,

-Jesse Anderson
"The Andersons"

6 months update

I wish I would have wrote weekly updates while pregnant and then turned it into monthly updates once Harlan was born but its better late than never.

6 months old

(Exactly 6 months, 1 week 6 days OR 27 weeks, 5 days)

 

Height & Weight: At his 6 month check up Harlan weighed 13 lb 3 oz and was 25 inches long. That means he's gained 8 lb 3 oz since he was born and has grown 8 inches! Averaging at about 1.3 inches a month and 1.3 pounds a month. Slow and steady wins the race! :)

 

Sizes: Harlan fits in 0-3 months in onsies. In shorts and pants he fits in newborn-3 months. He can fit in 3-6 months onsies but they are still a little loose and long on him. In pajamas he has jumped to 3-9 months since he keeps growing in length and keeps growing out of his footie pajamas! Although since we have had such a warm summer he's been sleeping at night in just a diaper and a sleep sack!

Eating: Up until Harlan was 4 months old I was breastfeeding and supplementing with formula. Once I went back to work Harlan had no interest in breastfeeding when he was around me because he didn't want to do the work for it. Since then I have been exclusively pumping and he gets bottle fed about 99% breast milk and 1% formula for supplemental purposes. He eats about 4oz every 3 hours. We have been trying to introduce him to solids off and on since he was 4 months old but has not really been interested in it until recently. On Friday night he tried yogurt for the first time. I fed him yobaby vanilla organic yogurt. The first bite he spit it back out and made a face like, "what the heck are you feeding me woman?!" but he loved every other bite after it and had about 3/4 of the container. My mom fed it to him for the second time yesterday and he was even opening his mouth when he saw the spoon coming. He still gets full off of breast milk so I don't see us using it as a way to feed him especially since its less calories.. but I love introducing something to him and seeing him enjoying it.

 

A video of this third time eating yogurt

 



Sleeping:
Night time: My lovely husband Jesse takes care of Harlan during the night since I have to get up for work at 2:45 am for work and then on the weekends allows me to get some extra sleep since on my work days I have to get up at 2:45 in the morning which is amazing so I can't say first hand his night time sleep schedule. Whenever I take care of him during the night he is an angel and only wakes up for one feeding although Jesse tells me he can wake up multiple times a night sometimes. I've noticed that as long as you give him at least 4 ounces at bed time and then at least 3 ounces the first time we wakes up for a feeding during the middle of the night he is less likely to wake up multiple times during the middle of the night. He is also just getting over a sleep regression. Up until June he was sleeping in the co sleeper right next to me beside the bed but he has grown out of it in length so we had to move him to his crib. If Jesse is having a tough time with him waking up multiple times in the crib he'll kick me out of the bed to the couch and will co sleep with Harlan in my spot since he sometimes sleeps better in our bed. We do not like having both of us sleep with him since he is still so small and I have a huge fear of him getting smothered or squished.

Daytime: Harlan generally only sleeps for 10-15 minutes spurts throughout the day, its very hard to have him take very good naps.

Language:

Firsts & Milestones:

• Harlan went over to Eastern Washington for his first Brooks Family reunion at the two rivers park

 

• went into the river for the first time with mommy and daddy

• teething (the first tooth has almost broke through!)
• first time eating yogurt (Friday August 16)

 

• starting to be able to sit up on his own after some practice

• went to go see his 4th movie in the theatre. "Airplanes", he slept through the first half and then watched the second half. He started to get fussy the last 5 minutes of the movie.

Memories:

• I was watching the music video to "the boys 'round here" by Blake Shelton and I started to sing it to Harlan. He started laughing so hard and smiling every time I sang the chorus to him. He absolutely loved it! Whenever he is being fussy myself or my family members sing the song to him and it cheers him up.

• We were driving back from the tri-cities and Jesse said to Harlan "ITS SO FLUFFFYYYYY!!!!" in the voice the little girl made from the movie "Despicable Me" and he started cracking up laughing. Now whenever we say that to him in that voice he will automatically smile or laugh even if he's fussy.
 
 
 

• Harlan kicks his legs like crazy! He is going to be a little soccer player with his kicking.

Favorite clothes: Any of the monsters inc/university clothes we bought him. His cousin Lori recently bought him some adorable summer one piece outfits that I'm trying to get a lot of usage out of them before the warm days are over. Its so hard for me not to buy him a monsters inc outfit when I see it. Although I cannot wait for him to wear his carhartt overalls and some little Georgia boots come fall time!

What is in our diaper bag?:
 

• wipes
• star teether
• changing pad
• diapers
• pediacare
• themometer
• pacifiers
• baby powder
• tylenol (for mommy)
• (2) hat
• gentian violet
• pacifier wipes
• (3) onsies
• pants
• shorts
• sleeping monitor
• toys
• lipgloss (for mommy)
• camera

These past 6 months have been the best 6 months of my life. Harlan has started to get his own little personality and recognizes people now. Whenever he hears his grandpas voice or any of his uncles voice he gets a huge smile on his face and shifts his head as far as he can trying to find them. Whenever I come home from my 10 hour day at work and Harlan hears my voice he tries to make a 360 degree neck turn to find his mommy.. and gosh darn it if I don't pick him up immediately he will throw a fit! The second his dad walks in the door from being at work all day he starts bouncing and kicking his legs. He keeps growing a personality more and more each day and I can't stop loving it.

-Mommy Roy

The Long and Winding Road

    In high school, I used to lay in bed, thinking about what the future would hold. Every Teenager has that "crystal ball" moment. We manufacture in our mind, what's next, all the while, not understanding one bit, that what happens today affects what's in store for tomorrow and beyond. We tend to conveniently forget that the road we all travel though life is directly affected by the moments we share and experience each and every day. For some, a pre-determined path leads the right way, with family support, good influences, and the right mindset to not accept failure. For some, sadly, their path seems derailed before the train leaves the station. For the rest of us, we were just lucky I suppose. I'm all of the above.

    I sit here writing this, in my hobby room, with Harlan sleeping peacefully on my couch, listening to old Green Day songs. The melodies bringing me back to a crossroads in my young life. We all have them. A point burned in our memories, where life could've taken any one of a number of paths. Looking at him, swaddled and beautiful, I'd say my path, potholes aside, has been right on the money. Everything I've ever dreamed of.

    Remembering back, it scares me now, just how one small detail, one then-insignificant event, could've kept me from him. I would never have met my amazing wife. This child, this amazing child, would still be a distant dream, instead of a perfect reality. Some would call it a blessing, some would call it dumb-luck, some would call it karma. I'm not sure what I would call it. Maybe a combination of everything. I'd like to say I've made some good decisions in my life that led this, along with the bad ones.

    Still, as random as life can be at times, and how quickly experiences alter the paths we choose take, I feel as though some thanks are in order:

Thanks to my sister, who I fought valiantly for years, only to realize, that having a sibling was a blessing all along. Thanks for irritating me, and making me remember how special you are.

Thanks to my parents, who were, and still are, my saving grace. You two gave us everything you could, you taught us values, and what it took to be a good person. I wish I could repay you for the guidance you've given over the years, words aren't enough.

Thanks to all who have done me wrong along the way. Because of your various actions, I'm a better person, a better husband, and a better father. You're the examples that I don't want to be, and I strive to be better than.

Thanks to my beautiful wife Amy. Words don't really describe what you've done for me, and what you've meant to me, these past several years. my love and admiration only grows with each day.

Lastly, thanks to life. Thanks to all the experiences. Thanks to the beatdowns, the triumphs, the tragedies, the laughs, and the tears. Without one of these, I may not be sitting here writhing this post, listening to music, thinking of my past, and looking at Harlan, laying so perfectly on my couch.

Thank you to all, I'm still enjoying this ride.

-JRoy


   

Chill Pill

I was sweating bullets.

     I was nervous, scared, stressed, and a touch overwhelmed. You'd think I was making a speech, or was engulfed in a life-threatening situation. I was taking a baby to a doctor's appointment.
I'd never felt so unsure of myself during these 6 months, than I did this morning. It made me chuckle afterwards, how a happy-go-lucky nurse asking me simple questions could freeze me right where I stood. As the infamous Bob Wiley says, "I'm all locked up!"

    What was wrong with me? No coffee? No breakfast? No sleep? Check, check, and......check, but that wasn't the reason. I was without my wingman, er, woman. Amy was working and left this mindless task to me. Seemed like 20 questions from hell, but I digress.
All too often, we as fathers take for granted what the "Supermoms" do so effortlessly, so efficiently, each and every day. We think we have a clue, we don't have a prayer.

    Sometimes we realize on our own, the things a great mother does, but most of the time, we haven't the slightest idea, and Mother Nature, herself has to slap us upside the head a couple times. That was this morning at 8:30AM. Mommy nature 'done bitch-slapped me real good. It's truly the little things that make the biggest difference. The way she rocks him to sleep. The way she talks to him. the way she makes the world seem trouble-free. Hell, the way she takes him to the doctor. I can try, and I do, try to convey these things. I try to play it cool, but I'm not momma, she's the cool character 'round these parts. I'm just a blubbering, hot-mess of a man. Or better put, daddy.

   So next time you see your wife, mom, or baby-momma, tell her thanks. Thanks for being "Supermom", and putting up with your "Daddy-Tendencies".



Still enjoying the ride, every stroke-inducing moment.


-JRoy

Down the Rabbit Hole

    Six months in. It seems like everything I've done in 25 years up to this year has been a precursor. Like preseason football to what really matters. Not completely meaningless, yet totally miniscule compared to 2013 in general. Could be the breast milk talking, who knows anymore....

It's still just so fascinating to me. At a point during the third trimester, I stopped worrying about what might happen. No big deal, humans have been making babies since Adam found Eve's garden. I started to feel cocky, like these past 9 months had me prepared. I was ready for anything.
That February morning, I felt like I dropped down the rabbit hole to Wonderland, what I thought I knew, I didn't have a clue about. It was a world I wasn't ready for. A world with laughs and tears. Diapers and bottles. Precious memories and debt. Post-pardum and unbridled joy.
And although I have dirtied my fluffy white tail along the way, I've emerged enlightened.


    I'll be the first to admit, This shit is hard, real hard. 3AM feedings and blown-out diapers in enough to drive anyone insane at some point. Add in a case of Post-Pardum depression still going strong at 6 months, and you've got a recipe for disaster. Psh. I got this......

........Still cocky at points, still getting kicked in the balls by life for being cocky. I'll never learn.

    Yet it's all worth while. Every single stressful moment. Because when I walk through that apartment door at 6PM each day, strung-out on "stupid", there's a smile. A smile that only a parent gets. It's that second when he looks at me, and happiness take over his little body. He wiggles in Mommy's arms, trying to break free. He wants to be with daddy. It's enough to make your heart melt.
It makes me feel like I'm doing a good job. He doesn't judge me, He doesn't care about my short-comings, or how I feel like breaking down when the world gets too large for my shoulders. None of that matters to him, he only loves me unconditionally. If I could harness the power of that little smile, world peace would be a reality, not a pipe dream.


    This ride is a wild one, like the car rides we all made with friends under the influence of something illicit. Just when you feel comfortable in your abilities to handle parenthood, life catches you without a seatbelt at a tight corner. Nevertheless, I couldn't imagine trading it for anything, worldly or otherwise. this ride is so bitchin', and I feel blessed each day I spend it with family, my wife, and my son.


Enjoy the ride my friends.

-JRoy